CrackPipe

Sex

Purse Snatching, Phone Stealing, Pinky Licking Goodtime

“A Minnesota man, 26, is facing felony charges for allegedly stealing a cell phone and purse from a woman he mugged on a St. Paul street early Saturday morning. According to police, after the woman turned over her belongings, Davis announced, “Now I’m going to suck your feet.”
 Meet Carlton Davis

Oh Vey What With All This Nazi Jews And Jewish Nazi’s…

“Israeli police say they have broken up a gang of neo-Nazis who are accused of carrying out attacks on foreigners, gay people and religious Jews. “
Kosher Camp

You Know That Bit Near The End Of Total Recall Where Their Faces Melt? Like That But With A Habanero Pepper

Feeling Hot Hot Hot

Peanut Butter Proves The Existence Of God.

Crunchy Thoughts

Paula Abdul Gets Dumped From The Bratz Movie: Where’s God Now?


A honey bun? Nows I’s Gots To Stabs Ya.

“An unidentified man was cut while fighting with another over whether to stop the car to buy a pastry in southwest Shreveport, police say.”
“The passenger told the driver to stop because he wanted a honey bun, but that didn’t happen quickly enough.”
ProportionalResponsePipe

Gay? Damn Straight.

“Several corporations are now supporting the homosexual agenda. These companies have been convinced by homosexual activists and the mainstream media that in order to be “fair and tolerant,” companies must make special rules for homosexuals and provide company money and resources to help promote their lifestyle. Many companies, at the urging of these groups, have […]

Man Beats Car With Dead Pigeon.

“A naked man arrested for beating a car with a dead pigeon last summer was sentenced to a year in prison Monday for animal cruelty.”
Coo Pipe

Nothing Says I Love You Like The Severed Head Of A Kitten.

“The pretty wrapping on the package left on the doorstep of a Mount Washington woman’s home looked harmless enough.”
“But she immediately knew it was from her ex-boyfriend, and what she found inside was disturbing — the severed head of a kitten. A note accompanying the package said, “I love you, Your Ben.”
Mixed Signals Pipe
 

If Dog Shit Is Political Expression Then My Balls Are The “I Have A Dream” Of The 21st Century.

“Kathleen Ensz faces a misdemeanor charge of “use of a noxious substance.” She is accused of taking dog feces from her backyard, wrapping it in a political mailer from Rep. Marilyn Musgrave, and leaving it at the Republican’s office, according to court documents.”
She is claiming the action is protected under the 1st Amendment. 
So Parliament and […]