“Due to my inability to deploy my Taser, I had to resort to punching him as hard as I could in the face. It is a taught technique.”
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TheLawPipe
Police Man Vs Terrorist
Woman Stabs Man Over Crappy Sex
“The woman, who was visiting her boyfriend on a short-term visa, claims she stabbed her boyfriend in self-defense.”
“The man, who was seriously injured in the attack, claims the fight was solely because of her disappointment with the evening’s sex.”
OutPipe - Fella? Why Would You Admit To That?
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Thief With Hammer Defeated By Mushy Peas In A Bowl.
“Kieran Naylor, 21, of Monks Lane, Breightmet, hit the owner of the Breightmet Lucky Supper Bar with a hammer in September 2006.
The owner’s partner threw a hot bowl of mushy peas at Naylor.
Bolton Crown Court heard how he slipped on the peas that landed on the floor.”
OutPipe - Why Can’t We Just Give Peas A […]
The World Is Filled With Too Many Blind People. We Should Kill Some. Plus Its Good For The Planet.
“The National Federation of the Blind said it is very concerned about any law that would require more hybrid and fuel efficient cars be sold because those cars make very little noise.”Â
“For blind people we use the sound of the traffic not only to determine when to cross the street, but to navigate, and hybrid […]
Too Much Bleach? Drilling Through The Wrong Part Of A Tooth? Puncturing A Woman’s Nose?
Best Dentist in The World.
Ms Chyzy said that she was shocked when the patient’s face swelled up and decided to refer her to a GP and then a facial surgeon.
“It was not something I’d seen before,” she said.
“I wasn’t sure what had happened.
“I referred her to a facial surgeon - I was very concerned about […]
Doors In Your Face? Snow Balls? SWAT?
Don’t Make The Optician Angry.
Man Beats Car With Dead Pigeon.
“A naked man arrested for beating a car with a dead pigeon last summer was sentenced to a year in prison Monday for animal cruelty.”
Coo Pipe
What Do Adolf Hitler, Joseph Stalin, Genghis Khan, Mao Zedong, King Herod, Al Capone and Mickey Mouse All Have In Common?
That’s correct. They were all Mormons.
“The Mormons, a U.S.-based denomination officially named the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (LDS), encourage members to baptize the dead by proxy in the belief they are helping the deceased attain full access to heaven.”
“This has outraged Jews and baffled Christians.”
Dead Cert Pipe
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Nothing Says I Love You Like The Severed Head Of A Kitten.
“The pretty wrapping on the package left on the doorstep of a Mount Washington woman’s home looked harmless enough.”
“But she immediately knew it was from her ex-boyfriend, and what she found inside was disturbing — the severed head of a kitten. A note accompanying the package said, “I love you, Your Ben.”
Mixed Signals Pipe
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You Rob A Bank And Leave Your ID Behind? Released From Prison You Rob A Bank And The Dye Pack Explodes In Your Face? So You Go Back - The Same Day - To The Same Bank, Rob It Once Again, Get Another Dye Pack Which Blows Up In Your Face Once More. Just Kill Yourself. Please.
Some people are just too dumb to live.
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